Impactful Discomfort: Be a Root
Let's discuss the concept of “impactful discomfort." I don't know if this is a real term or if I made it up in a weed-fueled writing frenzy. I'll define it: intentional actions of disruption that actually have a positive impact on the marginalized communities targeted by systemic hate.
It is action with real results which benefit those most vulnerable. We'll talk about what those actions are later.
White people like you feel lost and surprised by the things we've warned about for years. Decades. I'm not sharing screenshots- do the leg work and look at your own social media feeds. What do you see?
It's the same shit we always see: y'all are worried about what to do next. Scared to be lumped in with them.
Y'all are shocked despite how vocal Black women have been about the insidious nature of this country. Hell, I wrote a book breaking down the whole nature of this shit! So I am going to throw you a bone. One of the last ones I have. I'm gonna throw you a bone and hope it sticks in your throat so you always remember it is there.
Step 1: Give me a fucking break. Stop whining and get to work.
We all know that growth is uncomfortable. Even as children we learn about "growing pains" as our limbs stretch to accommodate our wholeness. It's necessary and to grow one must push past the limits of their current container. Nature shows us what happens when we try to stay in boxes too small for our existence. Roots break through flower pots, reach out to the world, and grab what they need to thrive. They adapt and evolve. They learn.
Step 2: Be a root; Stop Opting Out
No more running away from difficult discussions with your families. No more ending friendships. It's time to stop boycotting business without actively pushing back. That’s the easy route for you because you can say” I tried” and then never think about it again. It's what you do until something big happens and you recenter your emotions over those who are actually at risk.
I challenge you to stop opting out. If your comfort is at the forfront of this struggle, then you don't actually wish to do the work. You SHOULD be uncomfortable. Make yourself a target by pushing back loudly. Call out the microaggressions you and your people toss out so easily. All that resistance talk y’all like to throw around to seem cool? Yeah, time to live it.
Because you don’t get to sit in your safety, checking out when this is the reason we are here. non-Black people stay checking out.
That. Is. The. Problem.
Y’all turn off the discomfort as you wish, opting to show up only when the gestures are sweeping, and grand, and pointless.
Things like engaging in self-important pep rallies disguised as Protest Marches; like performative Pussy Hat pageants; like securing safety pins but not health care.
Step 3: Be Who You Say You Are
No more screaming "Stronger Together" in bespoke pantsuits when you're weak in follow through. In stamina. In honesty.
Because although you shed enraged tears, you manage to still jolt in surprise when what we warn comes to pass. You market Transactional Missions require compliance and acceptance Of whiteness dressed up as spirituality and toxic positivity. You donate your garbage, but horde your wealth. You champion white-saviors but not Black mothers.
Let’s face it: Your advocacy is weak. As are you. These lukewarm protest are the flimsy actions of people who don’t understand struggle, discomfort, desperation.despair.
But more importantly, these are the protests of those who just want to appear better than them without actually wanting to get your hands dirty. No blue bracelet needed. We see you. And we will not be fooled.
Y’all love to ride our labor, co-opt our movements and pump your fists as a cover for your self-absorption, avoidance, lack of accountability, and flimsy constitution.
So what I want is for y’all to be just as tired as we are. I want y’all to be worried and uncomfortable all the time. I want you to doubt your safety and maintain the proper tone, demeanor, and attitude all while trying to figure out which ism your existence has triggered.
I want y’all to not know who to trust. To worry if the person next to you wishes you harm.
Black people- Black women, especially, are setting this burden down. We’ve carried it for too long- the weight of a country built on the promise of freedom but only if you look, act, live, believe...
This country operates in Anti-Blackness. When sexual assault, felonies, lies, bankruptcies, and hate filled outburst don’t turn you off but a cackle does, you are hating Blackness.
You’re not racist? Ok, why then was he your choice? What reason is there that elevates him above her? Just kidding; don’t actually tell me because nothing you can say will explain how after everything we know about him, you still chose hate.
Instead, show out with impactful discomfort. Challenge your comfort and the comfort of your family and friends. Don’t sit with us; sit with them. And keep your fucking shock and blue bracelets. We don't trust you.
Instead, do what people who look like me are forced to do every day regardless of our discomfort and our security: fight.
And you do this by naming the evils facing us all.
- White Supremacy.
- Anti-Blackness.
- Racism.
- Misogynoir.
- Sexism.
- Ableism.
- Homophobia.
- Transphobia
- Hatred.
Choose one, some, all. Learn what these words and concepts mean. Read books written by authors of marginalized genders and marginalized abilities. Use "the gogo" to access information that has been readily available for years.
Then, embrace facts. Embrace the facts of your reality. Admit that you have been born into and raised by complacency and willful ignorance. Admit that this racist one-sided system afford’s you comfort simply by allowing you the opportunity to escape the shit, if only for a minute. COMMIT to being disruptive. THEN DO IT.
First published on My Mercurial Nature.